Aliens have taken over

-- pshhhhhhhhhh --

Something. Is. Not. Very. Good. Here.

Little. Strange. People. Living. In. House.

Do. Not. Understand. Them.

Worried. I. Can't. Make. It. Another. Day.

Torture. Has. Begun.

Dear Universe:

I've been going through the motions of this ride called Motherhood this week and just about each step has made me question if, perhaps, my house and life has been invaded by sources from another planet.

These are not my children. They can't be mine. There's no way they came out of me.

No, sirs or madams. Please send me back my sweet toddlers, who threw tantrums and cried only half the day -- not all day.

Please, I beg you, return my little angels in one piece and statements like, "Just Shoot Me Now," shall never be uttered again. I swear on your spacey-aged music.

For if you leave these "foreign objects" here any longer I am afraid I will need my own gadget to ride me out of here, to a place where I will suddenly understand the language, where "no" means no, "yes" means yes and we can all pick one or the other instead of staying somewhere in the middle of yesnoyesnoyesno land.

And the hitting. I'm sorry, but hitting, pinching, slapping, kicking and throwing should mean time out and time out should mean stop what you just did and that means don't do it again -- NOT two seconds later.

And, please take with you all articles of clothing that look remotely cool enough for 2 toddlers to want to wear at the same time. And shove our ONE swing in that vehicle of yours, too, because if I have to drag another child out of it to put another one into it, well, let's just say that meteors will be the least of your troubles.

Finally, if you bring my girls back, I am sure that I will at least be able to keep a shiny, happy smiling face on until 8/ 8:15 a.m. which I understand this week has been a bit of a stretch.

I have tried my best to take care of your space children, though I understand you may think otherwise. At least I get them out of their beds in the morning as they cry frantically for their daddy, who is at work and will not be home for 12 hours. At least I hug them and apologize for the fifth time that hour that we do not have a car today and no we can't go for a ride. And, I swear that I will not lose my temper, again, when they are brawling on the kitchen floor and I haven't even poured the breakfast cereal in the bowl.

Please. Beam. That. Earthling. Who. Thought. I. Could. Handle. Two. 2-year-olds.

Please. Send. Help.

--pshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh --



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Lessons of forgiveness -- toddler style

One of the hardest parts of parenting our girls right now is the fact that they are sisters. First, I didn't have any siblings until I was practically an adult. I was used to playing alone and having everything to myself. And, Dan's one of three boys who all got along very well.

Some of the tougher situations right now involve two little girls who want the same thing -- even if another is available. The result for the longest time was the younger girl, the softer one, the more easy-going one gave up easily when her sister bullied her.

But, now she is fighting back. With a vengeance, too.

The other challenge is that when they get mad they do not have words to use to fight. Only little fists, heads and, much to my dismay, objects. I used to think the head-butting was awful, that the punching was a sign of my bad mothering. I've stressed about how to handle these situations since they began around a year, not wanting to make a bad decision.

But this week has brought all of this to a new level.

A simple toy that was just that -- a toy -- for two weeks became a weapon. A metal tin with Santa Claus on the lid. They had been innocently putting little fuzzy craft balls into it, and putting on the lid. They had been banging the two pieces together as a drum or musical instrument.

I left them alone, which I try to do once or twice a day, in their playroom. But when I heard the bang and then heard the cry, I knew somebody had gotten hurt. Evidence points to the metal tin being the weapon. A cut and a bump were left behind on one very upset little girl.

And yet the assaulter in this case just laughed at my attempts to show her the urgency of the situation. Take the toy away -- OK, she'll pick up another. Go to the corner, OK, she'll stand there quietly and then come out laughing. Say your sorry, gladly. She knows it's a boo-boo and she knows what did it, too.

Meanwhile, I've discovered that in all three incidents this week -- the assaulter is trying to defend her goods from the sister who, until now, always got what she wanted.

My goal, I have to keep remembering, is that hitting of any kind will not be tolerated, no matter how frustrated you get. And, when it does happen, they have to make up with a hug, eventually.

All of this is hard to communicate with two almost 2-year-olds who are just learning about the powers they have.

Despite all of this, they teach me the biggest lesson of all by saying they are sorry -- in sign language -- and moving on a minute later as if what just happened wasn't the worst thing ever.

Now I have to cope with the decision to stop leaving them alone, which has been a great relief for my sanity a couple times a day and good for their sisterly bonding as well, or realize that sibling rivalry is a part of life and they have to learn to deal with it.


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The Snowballing Effect for Babies

I couldn't even count the number of times people told me that caring for infant twins would get easier. I remember about half way through that first year -- inundated with day care illnesses one after the other -- and thinking these people were nuts.

But, alas, it did get easier -- as soon as I stopped working, but before they officially became toddlers at 18 months.

Now, I took back with my hindsight glasses and wonder what the heck was so hard about those first several months. (I'm kidding; it was much harder.)

Still, in the middle of our days together I have these moments that take me back to those worries I had in the earlier days and think, duh, that was nothing!

The older they get the more substantial everything is compared to when they were younger. I thought when they started crawling that I needed to baby proof because they were getting "into everything." HA. That's a joke. The proofing had only begun then. Then, when they walked, I thought I had to baby proof. That was still easy.

Now, at 21 months I'm finally perfecting The Art of Babyproofing by considering moving all furniture and personal items into a motel for the next two years. I'll go there, too.

And, the crying, I thought that would have been easier by now, but it's louder and they can cling to your leg so you can't get anything done. I remember feeling like it was the end of the world when they were crying and were sitting in their bouncy chairs. Oh, how easy those days were!

Now and then (maybe now and then is an understatement) Liana will come up to me with a toy -- usually her Doodle Pro -- and hand it to me with expectations. Now, this girl is a master scribbler. She has the patience of a saint for this one task.

I have no idea what she wants so I try clearing the screen -- she throws a fit -- I try writing on it -- she throws a fit -- I try giving it back to her -- she throws a fit, this time slamming herself down on the floor. I try putting it down -- but, her fit has consumed her and I just walk away, knowing there is no reasoning with her. In the past, though, I've also tried putting the pen in its holder -- and, guess what? She throws a fit. What's left, people?

Other snowballing effects that I've noticed include the food issues. When they were infants they had trouble digesting milk. That was hard. Then, when they started table foods, Jadyn gagged and threw up until she was almost 12 months. That was hard. Then from 12 months to 20 months, I would say they ate very well. We had our difficult meals, yes, but overall I wasn't doing much complaining.

Well, now ... now is a completely different story. They can see something on the counter and set their minds to it. Or, just think about a food and want it -- and nothing else.

"Appool!"
"Appool!"

"Juu"
"Juu"

And, the food throwing. That was really bad when they were just starting table foods, right?

Nah, try having two toddlers throw -- in anger -- their plates that are full of foods. At once.

But, this snowballing effect works in the other direction, too -- the good stuff. Their first kisses were basically lips or tongue put on our cheeks once in a while. Now, they are clear, full-blown puckered lips with popping smacks again and again -- when they want to, that is.

Those are what I hope and pray will start our day. And, end them, too. When that happens, the middle part gets kinda blurry.



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Winterizing for toddlers

Fall is definitely here, despite some oddly warm temperatures, again.

And all the moms and dads who are at home full-time that I know are starting to worry about what it will be like stuck at home in the winter with energetic toddlers.

I, personally, love rainy days that force me to stay inside instead of venturing into the great outdoors – now and then.

Still, a part of me is wondering what the heck we will do with all of our time, especially now that my girls only sleep once a day.

But, fear not, because I have plenty of indoor activities for toddlers on my brain. I checked out a couple books from the library. I’m gathering craft materials, reading blog posts and collecting ideas. And, just like I used to do when I first started this blog, I'll report on how well they went. Or, not.

I’ve cleaned out the storage room next to my office and created a second play and craft room so that I might be able to get a few words typed each day.

Basically, I’m digesting all the information I can to be ready for our great hibernation.

I’m looking forward to the challenge.

But, when spring arrives, I’ll be ready to dive into many, many, many hours outside.

Mamablogga had a great post on this topic a while back. And, on my other blog -- the one none of you know about -- I talk about this topic a lot. (And, if you want access to that "other" blog of mine, send me an email and I'll send you the link.)

How about we share a few more ideas here in the comments section?